


This Shouldn’t be Happening... but it has to be done

by Silent_Observer_of_time



Series: Spears and Bones [3]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Awkward Conversations, Big Brother Sans, Brotherly Bonding, Cockblocking, Confusion, Developing Relationship, Dom/sub Play, Fucking, Implied Relationships, Inappropriate Humor, Internal Conflict, Light BDSM, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Minor Grillby/Sans, Minor Papyrus/Muffet, Minor Sans/Everyone, Moral Dilemmas, Muffet's Pet, Nice Flowey, One Night Stands, Overprotective Sans, Papyrus Has Issues, Papyrus in denial, Papyrus-centric, Post-Undertale Neutral Route - King Papyrus Ending, Sans Has Issues, Sans Swearing, Sexual Humor, Teasing, The Author Regrets Everything, Undecided Relationship(s), Underfell Flowey, Underfell Muffet, Underfell Papyrus, Underfell Sans, Virginity Kink, Vore (Almost)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-02
Updated: 2018-08-26
Packaged: 2018-09-14 05:32:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9164305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silent_Observer_of_time/pseuds/Silent_Observer_of_time
Summary: An extension within the 4th Chapter of What would've happened if... [POV: Papyrus]: King Papyrus Ending. [THE NOT NICE CONTENT Part]After Undyne's death, King Papyrus has some morality and trust issues towards everyone.Sans is the only monster (Flowey is a plant) who the skeleton holds a small piece of attachment left and here comes the problem...They don't know what type/level of Love they have for each other and it's giving Sans a problem.*P.S. Will end this in due time, hopefully has less than 5 chapters... Let me get this out of my system so I can continue something without these thoughts...  \ o_o /





	1. A DAILY RITUAL FOR YOUR BROTHER'S HEAT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It isn't helpful when the skeleton has to handle Sans' Heat every month. The same brother who keeps coming to him when he wants to fuck since in the Underground, fucking with everyone is a norm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sex and rape is different. In sex, you have the monster's consent. Rape, you don't have consent. That's why it's called unconsented sex.

 

"SANS. GAH! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING WITH ME? HOW ARE YOU- WE JUST. NEVER MIND!" Papyrus groaned as he glared at his 'adviser' kissing his exposed left clavicle wantonly. Getting sexually aroused on your bed by your own brother after a tiring mission was one of the worst things Sans has ever done to him in the morning. Sans was even removing his golden belt- 'HELL NO.' 

"punish me..." Sans pleaded, he even reeked with sex and Papyrus has had enough shit for today. However, this was his adviser and Sans was giving his pelvis a bruise with all that hip grinding. Papyrus sat up, grabbed his brother down for a tackle and used his blue magic to make him stay in place. Papyrus stood up, staring at his pants...

'THIS IS NOT MY DAY...'' Papyrus stomped to his closet. He hates it when Sans touches him and stimulates his magic to conjure... a dick. Too bad, the skeleton isn't going to get it. Getting his ropes and other material, Papyrus turns to see Sans squirming and trying to say something. It wasn't intelligent mind you, more like unnecessary begging. Fuck. His pants are tight. He's going to jerk that off later. Papyrus kneels down and lifts his brother's chin up, "Sans... Why the hell are your heats turning more and more irregular? 

"!" Papyrus' eyes widened marginally when Sans raised his head to give him a sloppy kiss. Papyrus moves away and smothers the skeleton's head with a pillow. Applying as much pressure as possible, Papyrus wasn't a happy skeleton when he sees Sans try to tug his hands to remove his grip. Papyrus knows how much pressure is needed to crack a skull so Sans wasn't in any immediate danger, not like he's going to say that to Sans out loud. He was fine making Sans believe he won't think twice in dusting his own brother, transforming this runt into a shivering mess. The Terrible Papyrus doesn't give a damn about filial piety.

"You dirty brother fucker!" Using his free hand, Papyrus grabbed both hands and ties it with the ropes (nah. It's chains. Sans was able to burn ropes with his magic last time) and twists the arm over Sans' head and all the way to the back. Capturing Sans' mouth with a kiss, Papyrus muffles the scream with his tongue tasting the strong taste of mustard and let's go before Sans could reciprocate the kiss. He didn't want anyone busting the door open like last time. Papyrus placed both hands beside Sans and stared at the desperate, confused expression of his prey. He can ask healers to fix the dislocated shoulders of his brother later. 

"Do you repent for your crimes?" Papyrus asked. Red tears in his eyes, Sans was crying in pain and grinned- What? Papyrus forgot about the legs, being twisted by Sans' legs as it gripped his lumbar vertebrae. On the bed, Sans lifts himself up to nibble his right clavicle. Papyrus gave a soft moan and pushed Sans back, flustered and more irritated than before. How stupid can he get to forget the COURAGE bursting in Sans' SOUL to try and fuck him? Papyrus gave an eerie smirk, stroking-nope scrapping his brothers scarred bones. It left thin red marks in its wake. "It seems you need to relearn your lesson, runt."

"then show me." Sans mocked and gasped as Papyrus breaks the floating rib's outer rim with his bare hands. Not really, he always wears his crimson gloves before he does anything. Papyrus then picks up a knife (Sans tries to get away from it) and slowly presses the knife's edge on each rib teasingly, injuring Sans further as his HP goes down decimal per decimal. Instead of screaming in pain, Sans remained quiet. He was staring at his younger brother intently and his breathing turned shallow, calming down. Papyrus was secretly tying Sans' legs with magic, only distracting Sans with his unknown fear of knives. 

"WHY AM I GIVEN A SADO-MASOCHIST FOR A BROTHER?" Papyrus asked rhetorically and caressed the knife injuries, healing it easily. It was easy because he didn't make it too deep. As he said before, it was a distraction and Sans really needs to get over with the knife phobia. Papyrus looks back at Sans and sees expectant eyes staring right at him. Papyrus sighs and moves his phalanges to examine his brother's new scars. He should call someone to handle Sans by now, seeing as the paperwork won't do themselves but-

'IT IS TOO EARLY FOR ANYONE TO COME HERE AND FUCK MY BROTHER.' Papyrus thought, glancing at the clock to see he had two hours of continuous teasing until it turns 8. Hearing groans and his brother's body quivering beneath him, Papyrus can trace the date of each scar and even mention the reasons why some scars exist. There were new ones but that must be made by the fire elemental. It's been a long time since he's injured his brother in a permanent manner, he shou- No. Scars equate to markings of territory. He didn't like his brother in a level most monsters lusts Sans for, Papyrus simply can't feel it. 

"b-boss? d-don't... don't stop?" His eyes were supposed to meet with Sans, but Papyrus decides to wander to the neck. Twisting Sans' cervical vertebrae to the side, Papyrus rubbed the recent bite mark with his thumb. Sans got a burned hickey? It was new too. Sans fidgets from the touch, Papyrus frowned. 

'I should heal it.' Papyrus thought sarcastically and leans over. Near the neck, he summons out his tongue and licks it, earning a moan from his brother. Now that the wounds covered in magic, it was easier to heal for him. Placing his hand over the neck, Papyrus gripped Sans' neck in a strangling motion as he kisses his brother again. Every time he kisses Sans on the bed, it's often a warning that he shouldn't move or do anything. Unfortunate for him, Sans was a good kisser and got annoyed when he pulls out from the kiss. Pushing himself away from the small skeleton with his free hand (the other hand lessened its grip on the neck, now fully-healed), Papyrus twitched when the bound legs were rubbing on his crotch. His cock better not cum in there. Heh. He was ordering his cock. He really needs to start seeing new monsters. He was even wearing some good pants. "NO, SANS. FOR THE LAST TIME, YOU ARE NOT GETTING ANY." 

"b-but..." Sans was a mess. The smallest of touches can send him to overdrive and Papyrus, being the responsible brother, has to deal with this every month. It was usually the first week of the month, but this heat happened at the last week of the month. It must be the drugs this skeleton was using. He'll find out when he taste the bastard's magic. He couldn't really taste it in the mouth because mustard overran his senses and Sans keeps on trying to get into his mouth. Spreading Sans' legs, Papyrus hears a soft pop on the left. Huh. He broke the femur? Man. He confessed he was the worst when it comes to torture tease people. Sans being the longest masochist he has to torture and try not to murder, was a testament to that.

"WIDER." Papyrus ordered and Sans willingly adjusted, a small drool coming out from the guy's mouth. Doesn't the injury hurt or is he enjoying this or worse, he did this a lot of time with different monsters? Papyrus wonders how many monsters have Sans fucked and got fucked by? Papyrus doesn't really know what to do when it comes to this 'SEX' part, only knowing the vanilla and BDSM tease. Papyrus stares. It was easier tasting a dick (a simple lick and strokes), but it was a vagina. Ecto-pussy... Whatever it is called. He should have paid attention to those sex-ed classes in **The Academy**. He sighs, gingerly bites on the conjured pussy in between his brother's legs and conjures his tongue to take a lick. None yet, he goes further. Sans whined and Papyrus had to hold Sans' ilium so the skeleton would stop thrusting upward.

'YUP... IT'S BITTER... HE USED CRACK... OKAY I'M SURE THAT'S THE TASTE OF CRACK. WHY IS SANS USING CRACK AGAIN?' Papyrus placed both hands on Sans' hips, taking his time finding out what his brother has been eating. Sans tries his best to rock his hips down at him (fail) and clamps his legs on his skull. After finding out the results, Papyrus lets go and got stuck because of Sans' legs. Yanking Sans' legs apart, he dislodged one side of Sans' patella. Papyrus never did ask if he was doing okay in the teasing department towards Sans... He must be that bad at it because Sans is crying again... 

"m-more please?" Sans pleaded, trying his best to be polite with his slutty needs. Correction. He was doing good? Papyrus hopes he doesn't get the heat ever. Papyrus spat the bitter taste in his mouth, utterly disgusting. Magic often tastes whatever food item and emotion the monster was feeling at this point. All Papyrus can taste is this week's food and a disgusting load of dissolved crack. He wasn't going to use his tongue that's for sure. Papyrus looks over and sees the new ball vibrator with remote on it. He doesn't know how this is the newest thing because all it does is vibrate and give mini-shocks on the wearer. Oh well. Papyrus looks at the clock. 1 hour? Double fuck. How is his dick still erected? Please tell him it isn't because of his slutty brother or he'd have to try castrating himself. He wasn't stimulated by this... Right?

"boss! gah. th-there~ mm~! hah" If he doesn't bound Sans all the way, his older brother clamps his legs on anything that stimulates him. Like right now, his hand is stuck in between his brother's legs as he's warming the skeleton for the soon-to-be-inserted vibrator. Triple fuck. All three of his phalanges are in there. Maybe if he- "b-boss~! more!" Okay. It was official. His gloves are going to the furnace, Sans dirtied it. Unredeemable. 

"WHO AM I GOING TO CALL THIS TIME?" Papyrus wondered, finally using his free hand to dislocate the kneecap of his brother. It gave him enough time to remove his hand covered in cum, place a knee in between Sans' legs to lean forward with his free hand and forcing Sans to wear a red collar to tie the leash on the bed frame.

"can i... j-just this once please?" Sans asked, eyes staring down at him with a drool. Papyrus looks down and sees his glowing dick reminding him to jack off and looks back at Sans. How many times should he state to his brother that 'No one is going to taste the Terrible Papyrus' cock.' Aside from the fact they'll find out he eats cherries and chocolate (God. King Asgore has some good chocolate) on his free time, Papyrus is mildly afraid of Sans' sharp teeth biting his magical penis off so it was a "NO." 

"then fuck me!" Sans ordered and was this small skeleton strong or plain stupid? Because it was either the bed or Sans who will break if any more force is exerted. Papyrus was about to place his hands back in but Sans used his kneecaps to clamp on his one knee and flipped him over for the how manieth time. Sans used not only magic, but also his injured knees to tug his pants down and (How did Sans become so flexible?) positioned himself at his cock to slam down on it.

"GAH! S-SANS!" Papyrus cringed-moaned as Sans bit on his clavicle as the small skeleton went up and down on his magical penis as if there was no tomorrow. Heaven's loo! Sans was tight and felt so good on his di- Freaking stop with this line of thought Papyrus. You vowed to Undyne that you are not going to fuck anyone, but your lover! Sans is the closest thing to you in this whole world, but he is your brother. Sans is not a lover. Okay. His penis was near it's climax and his mind is getting foggy, but he's the Terrible Papyrus. He will find a way out of this temptation. He repeats in more detail: he is not going to cum in his brother.

"S-SHOULD I CALL YOU A DICK RIDER?" Papyrus gritted his teeth as he held on to Sans' left humerus and snapped it. Sans gasp in pain, letting go of his bitten clavicle and Papyrus quickly gained control as he topples the shaking skeleton again. Grabbing his ropes, Papyrus had already inserted the vibrator inside (screw preparations, it led him to this situation) and held the connecting ropes for it.

"fucking hell boss.. really?" Sans likes complaining when he's teasing him. Sans should be glad the New King of the Underground is handling his Heat Problem. Said-King had already tied the tarsus together, now he has to tie the patella too with these black wires. Oh. There's more left. Papyrus flips Sans to the side and connects it to the bind of the wrists and flips Sans back to connect it to the collar/choker thing the Dog Couple gave him in the past... They said it can restrain magic but Sans is still rearing with magic. He should get a better leash. Papyrus looks down at his wringing prey and pressed the button. Quadruple Fuck. Sans' moans is making his dick twitch. Papyrus also realized castration wouldn't work because his dick's 'magical.'

"GO CRAZY WITH YOURSELF." Papyrus muttered as he tossed the button on the bed. Standing up, he started removing his clothes in front of the skeleton. Not only is he going to jerk off, he's also going to get a cold shower and pretend this never happened. Looking at the clock, it was ten minutes left. Good. After he finished taking a bath, he can call Grillby and be done with this.

 

*CRACK! *

 

"You didn't...." Papyrus said, slowly looking at his... broken phone. Looking back at Sans already pressing the button and staring at him with that 'innocent' (It does not look innocent when Sans' in heat, but Papyrus can tell) face and remembered Sans can read his mind. A one-sided communication, Great. "HORNY BASTARD. WHY DON'T YOU WANT GRILLBY TO COME OVER, SANS?" 

"i... want you... just you." Sans murmured and tried his best to sound calm, but it still sounded so needy. Papyrus moves his head to the side as he stared at Sans, removing his gloves and placing it in a black bag (to the furnace). "DID GRILLBY PROPOSE TO YOU...? SHOULD I SAY CONGRATULATIONS AND TELL ALL YOUR FUCK BUDDIES TO SLAUGHTER THE BARTENDER WHO'S KEEPING YOU AWAY FROM THEM ON YOUR ROUTINELY FUCK SESSION?"

"boss... one more comment about my fuck life and i swear to the mythical angel above the surface that i will fuck you every time you sleep." Sans warned, but his body was shaking and the smaller skeleton doesn't look all that scary if he's slightly shaking. Papyrus raised an eyebrow, "I'M NOT GOING TO FUCK YOU SANS. GIVE UP ON ME. I'M NOT INTERESTED, A LOST CAUSE FOR YOU. YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GET ANYTHING OR ACHIEVE ANYTHING IF YOU KEEP THIS UP."

"at least find out the feeling of getting fucked, virgin asshole." Sans lasts words made Papyrus frown as he closed the bathroom door. Rinsing his bones, Papyrus doesn't get Sans' logic of fucking people left and right, but that also includes Sans addiction to crack and mustard as well as how the skeleton constantly sleeps at erratic periods in time. Finishing his 'cleaning,' Papyrus does not enter his room to get his clothes (too risky) but goes out of the bathroom window where he clings onto the walls.

Landing inside a room, the tall naked skeleton sees a maid fixing a flower pot. The maid falls to the ground as she was unprepared with his surprise attack, Papyrus offers his hand and the maid takes it with a blush. Pulling the maid close, Papyrus whispered to her urgently. "Give me clothes and a phone. Sans is in heat and I am not going back in there."

"Y-Yes.. My King." The maid blushed and bows her head, but Papyrus noticed she was still staring at him as she left. Papyrus sits down on a chair, pulling out a quill as he begins his paperwork. 'I HOPE THE MAID HAS FRIENDS TO BANG MY BROTHER...'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That moment, you make a Papyrus who is conflicted, but actually enjoys his brother's disposition and very disturbed at his own thoughts... Should I tag this as Sad Papyrus? Hmm... Nah.


	2. THE NEGOTIATION BETWEEN BROTHERS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus knows this is wrong, not wanting to lose his brother bond with Sans because of the constant near-ACT of fucking him (he was only asked to tease the guy) as well as the fact Sans is starting to bother him in his work (don't suck the King's cock law). Therefore, he has to put this ACT to an end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus likes tying Sans up for various reasons: One, to keep Sans still and angry (too bad Sans is starting to get used to it). Two, he likes practicing his tying skills to a skilled escape artist. Three, said-skilled escaped artist is cocky enough to break free while he's still in the room. Four, he can torture Sans for information (and fun). And five, it occupies his thoughts.

  
Crap. This month's Heat session sucks... He wasn't able to fall asleep even when he gagged, tortured, teased, dildo-fucked Sans. Not like this was the exact problem, more like he couldn't leave the room unattended when he ties Sans up. Monsters tend to see this as an opportunity. However, if he doesn't leave Sans bound, Papyrus would just see Sans appearing right in front of him, push him down and try to fuck him before or during a meeting. The sad part here was... Sans wasn't in heat, he just wants to have sex. Papyrus has no choice but to confront his Judge. Again. Begrudgingly. Unwantingly. *SIGH*

"have my laziness rubbed on boss or did you drag my sleeping body in here few minutes ago?" Sans wondered, strapped on a chair for a mini-interrogation. It was the latter, Papyrus having to order some soldiers around to guard some of his allies in Waterfall. Usually, Papyrus would try out some of the illustrations done on the UnderNet to his brother. Sans was often asleep when he does these things...

"IT'S THE LATTER. ("yeah right." Sans wiggles his hands on the armchairs.) SANS. WHAT DO YOU WANT REALLY? YOU'VE BEEN TRYING TO FUCK ME FOR A WHILE AND I'M STARTING TO GET PISSED AT THE FACT I'M LOSING MORE PHONES THAN THE TIME WHEN THE ANNOYING DOG STARTED EATING MY LASAGNA." Papyrus straddled his chair, looking at Sans who was trying out the binds. It's just the two of them in his personal sound-proof room. It even has an aquarium and TV screen. Because of his brother and the nobles, Papyrus has received and bought so many torture devices and sex toys... Papyrus has no idea which one to use on a criminal since Sans was both a criminal and a sex lover.

"why do you kiss me from time to time and leave me hanging?" Sans asked instead, he tilts his head as if he was the one asking the questions. Papyrus placed his head down at the chair, his eyes wide at the revelation. Oh. OH. He didn't think his random kisses meant something to Sans, leading Sans on. Uh... He wasn't going to tell him that he has DESPAIR even if he's more strong and less attentive to his men, isolating himself bit by bit from society. What is he going to lie this time? Papyrus starts, "YOU WERE PART OF MY SOCIAL EXPERIMENT..."

"yeah... i'm the only one in the 'experiment.' i'm so honored~" Sans does his usual sarcasm to get to the point. Papyrus is still not staring at Sans, brainstorming a lot of thoughts to conclude this dilemma. If that was the reason why Sans isn't leaving him alone, he should have stopped the whole ACT entirely.

"IT'S A PERSONAL THING..." He confessed. However, who was he going to get Love from? Flowey??? Huh. That doesn't sound bad when he thinks about it. Flowey is capable of giving some actions worth transforming to Love. The best note here was Flowey isn't Fuck crazy. Now that he has a replacement in getting his needed supply of Love, what is he going to say to his brother now? "I WANTED TO SEE IF MY AFFECTIONATE GESTURE WOULD MAKE AN IMPACT TO SOMEONE'S LIFE AND WHAT BETTER MONSTER TO EXPERIMENT ON THAN MY LAZY BROTHER."

'AND IT DID APPARENTLY.' Papyrus looks up to see his brother staring at the left direction with a somewhat blank expression. Sans comments in a monotone voice. "so that's what it was... k. i'm cool"

"GOOD-" Papyrus had stood up and was about to start marching out to leave his brother yet Sans continues, "but i want compensation for all that shit you've put me through."

'ANNOYING GNAT.' Papyrus thought and turned to look at his plotting brother. If he had a maid beside him, he'd order her to fuck the guy while he escapes to the shadows. His personal doctor/Royal Scientist/Judge/Brother vocalized his wants. "I want a one-night stand with you."

"....WHY?" Papyrus asked. Is Sans serious? Is Sans really serious on wanting to fuck him when they are technically brothers?! Yeah. The Underground promotes incest and shit, but he recalls Undyne's promise... And the King shouldn't be fucking with his Royal Scientist/Judge/doctor! Sans shrugged, "i wanna see how good my bro is on the bed and i know you want to."

"IF I DO THAT... WILL YOU STOP BOTHERING ME WHEN YOU WANT SEX, YOU'RE IN HEAT AND YOU WILL WILLINGLY PUT UP WITH THE MATCHMAKERS IN FINDING YOUR LOVER?" Papyrus bargained. Sans was contemplating with the thought. Papyrus hoped Sans will back down and make a new proposition. However, Sans only added, "an experimental one-night stand without you thinking about work and your morality shit. oh and afterwards, i'll fuck you in the morning when we wake up and stay in the bed for the whole day. that means no work for me and you on that whole day."

"...." It's only for a day and then afterwards, no more Sans crawling on his back or on his pants. He's sure Undyne would understand right? Papyrus doesn't know how to feel about this. It makes him feel queasy. He knows Sans will think his silence means yes, but Papyrus has a bad feeling this. Sans crossed his arms contented with the answer. Damn. He forgot to place Sans' collar... Unless the small skeleton finally learned how to get out of his bounds without the use of magic. If so, Sans is going to be a bitch- Wait a minute. He won't need to tie him up anymore after this. But what will his BDSM hobby go? Sans won't allow him to do this to anyone in an interrogation. So it's either he discards the hobby or he'll practice this on Flowey... No. Just no. He'll discard it. Flowey isn't worth it. Papyrus sighs for the second time... 'THE THINGS I DO FOR SILENCE.'

"how about tomorrow? i know you're free this whole afternoon." Sans' all-knowing grin is starting to creep him out due to the fact this small skeleton knows majority of his future ACTIONs. Papyrus walks away, heading to the door. "AFTER DINNER OR YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE ME LOSE MY HUNGER."

"so i'm the dessert or-?" Sans was about to ask yet Papyrus slammed the door. He does not want to even think about it. Now, he has to indulge in his coffee before Sans finds out about his addiction to chocolate and sweets made by Muffet. He has until tomorrow to do all of this. He should also visit the golden flower as well... Papyrus continues to walk down the path.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in summary...  
>  ~~Sans admits he wanted to feel Papyrus's cock and pussy~~  
>  Sans actually wants Papyrus to relax and Papyrus consents to this because  
>  ~~he's a curious virgin king~~  
>  he'll be done with Sans and his interference in work.


	3. ASKING FOR ADVICE TOWARDS UNLIKELY ALLIES

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He didn't want to admit it, but King Papyrus doesn't know what a One-Night Stand means. He leaves to ask help from two allies. The first one declined while the second offered help. Also his treasurer and private pastry chef, this female laughed at his dilemma yet was willing to offer HELP.
> 
> *And then Sans comes over (cockblocker) during the practice session and causes Papyrus some trouble. Again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "So you don't want to get Love from your brother anymore?" The golden flower asked to the tall skeleton, tilting its head to see the skeleton's conflicted expression.
> 
> "YES? WELL... IT'S MORE LIKE I DON'T WANT TO RELY ON HIM." The King confessed as he stares at the so-called echo flower.
> 
> ...  
> .
> 
> "And what if you regret your decision?" Flowey asked before the skeleton left the Echo garden, "What if you realize you actually Love love your brother?"
> 
> "THEN I WILL CARRY THE TRUTH TO MY GRAVE." Papyrus sighs, walking off to his next destination.

[WATERFALL] 

 

“Sure I’ll share my Love with you, Papyrus!” Flowey replied, watching the skeleton chug down a gallon of coffee as they sat together beside the waterfall. Flowey looks around, curious. The golden flower remembers hearing some rumors and wanted to confirm something. “Is this about Sans again?”

“…YES.” Papyrus confessed. He sees the golden flower hum and move to and fro. “You should get ready then. Whatever you two are going to do…”

“WHY? DID YOU HEAR SOMETHING?” Papyrus asked, curious. Flowey looks at the side as if Sans might come any moment and looks back, whispering. "Are you two really going to end your relationship?"

"WE NEVER HAD A RELATIONSHIP." Papyrus' eyes sockets were blank. It must be the maids again and their keen hearing. He should send them as spies in the guilds he has yet to identify as either an ally or enemy. They always want to be in the neutral side. Flowey gave a small smile, "As brothers?"

"IT SHOULD END GIVEN THE CIRCUMSTANCES... HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF NEPOTISM? YES... I RATHER NOT PROMOTE THAT..." Papyrus turns his container upside down. Empty. Looking at Flowey, Papyrus asked. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT EXACTLY DOES A ONE-NIGHT STAND ENTAIL?"

"..." Flowey sweats a little, looking to the side when his friend stares at him for an answer. Flowey starts, as slowly as he can. "Judging from it's name... It has no emotions attached to it. It's purely sex."

"AND WHAT SORT OF SEX?" Papyrus saw the Flowey's eyes widen and immediately defends itself from the question, "H-How should I know about that?! I-I'm just flower! Go a-ask someone else!!"

"WAI-... FLOWEY..." Papyrus watched as Flowey ran away. The skeleton wanted to ask how the flower will offer Love since he always gets it from intimate actions but maybe it has something to do with the Love pellets Flowey mentioned when he was younger. That can heal so is that Love? Papyrus looks at the time, six more hours.... 'WHO ELSE CAN I GO TO? NO... I DON'T WANT TO GO THERE BUT SHE'S THE ONLY ONE I CAN TALK TO WHILE EATING... DAMN THE WORLD. I HAVE NO CHOICE DO I?'

* * *

[HOTLAND]

 

"I can't believe you accepted that~" The female spider giggled, placing a hot cup of espresso right in front of him. Papyrus crossed his legs as he took the cup. It wasn't bizarre for him to enter the spider's parlor as the female creates the best desserts in the whole Underground. Sadly, Papyrus frequents this area for his usual dose of pastries and coffee. Grillby was too far from his place. Thus, the tall skeleton opted to take her not only as a his usual coffee brewer, but also as the Royal Treasurer. In truth, Papyrus didn't take Grillby because of the elemental's focus towards his lazy brother. Taking Muffet, he was assured that only the riches are taken... Not really. Muffet just keeps it as a reassurance. Sad but true.

"It was to get Sans' eyes out of my dick but... I don't know what I did wrong?" Papyrus sighs, crossing his legs as he sat on the thin web of spider silk. One wrong move and he's a goner, falling down to the ground floor of Hotland. Drowning himself in espresso, the King might as well mention that this is a substitute to drinking alcoholic beverages. Four more hours and he has to return to the Castle for the **Thing**. "I tortured him relentlessly, said horrible things and to top all that, we're brothers. Why does Sans keep coming back and wanting more from me? Is it because he's a masochist? Is it because he knows I can't kill him?! Damn it."

"I don't see what's so wrong with the situation. It's a one-night stand. Just fuck your brother a couple of times and then... That's it. Unless Sans has a dick sucking fetish?" Muffet ponders. Papyrus took a bite on his suspended croissant on a saucer, silently wondering if he should tell the female that he has enforced a law called **Do not suck the King's Cock**... Nah. Papyrus munches on the croissant, 'GOT TO GET THE CHERRIES AND CHOCOLATE OUT OF MY SYSTEM!!!'

"Is incest not your thing?" Muffet asked and he nodded. Papyrus can say this is somewhat true, probably. Well... It was close to his opinion but not close. He wasn't going to say he sees Incest as something to be banned. That's too conservative and a restriction of the freedom of expression. Muffet laughs, she can't seem to stop laughing at his predicament can she? "Oh dearie~ You do know you have one of the most popular monster in the tip of your fingers? But then, your subtle flirting and rejection must be a challenge to the small monster... I, myself, like a good challenge~!"

"So you're saying after this, Sans will definitely get off my back?" Papyrus wondered as he twirled his coffee. He should have made Muffet his other adviser, but Sans would realize what he's up to. Subtle flirting, more like continuous teasing in the bed... Muffet pours more espresso, "Definitely~"

"Good." Papyrus sips, yet he doesn't understand why he feels internally sullen when he hears the answer. This was for the best and he wasn't the type to go back from his word. Maybe then, he'd be able to restore their usual routine of verbal arguments and constant insults. Muffet coos at her pet, petting the huge cupcake creature on the side of the room. "When is your appointment with destiny?"

"Don't call it that. It's disturbing to think of it as something life-changing." Papyrus eats another crumpet. He wonders if his magic tastes like crumpets now? Muffet's crumpets is slightly salty and some sweetness to it. Better than the taste of cake or chocolate or any fruits he binges on. Espresso is definitely bitter and Papyrus thinks this was good enough, remembering the times he has to keep coming back and forth… to excrete the excess magic. Papyrus continues, "After dinner. In my room..."

"..." Papyrus realized he won't be able to get out when the session starts. Stupid security features and how effective it is! And he already made sure his room is mostly sound proof to make sure the guards won't masturbate on the door like the following times. Seriously, can't they control their lust when they're right outside his door? Papyrus stares at the spiders bouncing around, thinking if Sans will be cruel enough get a lover that hates him. He should watch MTT's shows again to see what the main character did...

"Ahuhuhuhu~ Now I know why you're here. Our little King is a virgin and needs my assistance before the appointment~!" Muffet cheered in an eerie voice, resting one pair of hands on her chin, the other pair was holding a tea cup and it a tea pot while the last pair rests on her hips. The spider was right in front of him giving that sexy smirk of hers. She grinned when the monster she can already dub as her patron covered his mouth coughing with one hand. Muffet leans closer, resting on a dangling web, "I am right, ain't I? This is just swell... I'm glad to have such a fine gentleman to ask for a private tutorial~"

'DAMN. I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING.' Papyrus nearly spat out his coffee. She hit the spot he did not want to dwell on. In truth, Papyrus knows skeletons can produce both sexual organs at the same time, demonstrated with his sessions with Sans. Yet! He knows about the penis thing, lubricating it and stuffing it in random places (Anime thought him as much). What he doesn't get is the other-female part. He's already produced one when Undyne and he had to disguise as females (What a laugh that mission was) but he has no idea what to do to prep himself. He wasn't going in there as a male professional rapist and then transform into a first time female virgin. Nope. Sans does not deserve the latter part. But right now, Papyrus isn't going to show his FEARs to the spider. Placing the cup down, Papyrus leans close to the spider, "You may be right on that department... Yet, I will need you to pretend to be a male."

"As much as I want to take you and even researched how skeletons copulate... I hear a certain monster will destroy anyone who dares touch the King~" Muffet sits beside him as she orders her spiders to take the cups and dishes away. Locking the door, Muffet's hands roams around him - One hand caressing the side of his face, the other on his chest while the last ones went down to Papyrus' pants. Papyrus' felt his SOUL jumped, sensing the spider touching his bare bones was both very ticklish and arousing. So a foreign touch can stimulate him? Papyrus pushes Muffet down on the web, giving some licks on her neck and he slides her dress lower to take a teasing lick on her right breast. Muffet's voice turned into a bitter moan, struggling to continue her sentence. "Don't touch me or I will ruin my favorite laced panties~!"

"If you already researched about skeleton copulation then you must know what my problem is, witch. Besides, why are you wearing those lingerie today?" Papyrus sat up and watched as the spider keep her breath moderated. Papyrus looks to see his pants already down to his ankles and had to caress himself enough to produce an opening. Muffet exhales, "Nothing of your concern, my lovely dense King~ ("?" Papyrus had a question mark.) I understand what you want. Being the dominant one is a tedious task, having to always fuck someone with a dick... I'm envious of your brother"

"Having all your attention given your power over all. In the Underground, that's rare for dominate ones to be this way. You're one of a kind..." Muffet stares down at Papyrus' opening and asked, "Ever fingered yourself since I know you're the type to abstain from lust?"

"N-no... But that's not the point. T-teach me how to stretch **this** before the session..." Papyrus stuttered, suddenly ashamed on how Muffet was staring at his bottom part as if this was the first time she saw one. Muffet ducks down and Papyrus yelped in surprise when he felt a tongue lick his outer folds. Pushing Muffet away, Papyrus closed his legs and had his eyes wide open. He blushed when Muffet savored the taste, "I still taste chocolate. Very good chocolate. King level chocolate."

"DAMN IT!" Papyrus cursed and Muffet stood up, probably to make some more espresso. She looks at Papyrus, "Skeletons have an easier task in stretching their entrance... So I want you to start inserting your fingers one at a time and do a scissor like movement. It might feel a bit painful or even pleasurable but when you're starting to get used to it, insert another finger and repeat the process."

"When do I stop?" Papyrus' eyes went full circle when he saw Muffet drop a dildo. Muffet gave a shit-eating grin. "When I can stuff this toy in you to its full length~"

"You sadist." Papyrus squinted his eyes. Muffet merely laughs as she jumped off to get the coffee.

 

... 

..

.

 

"F-fuck...." Papyrus tried his best not to moan or sound like a whiny slut, but his first time with a dildo as well as the usage of his pussy caused him to use his fabled blue magic on himself. Why is he so sensitive?! Muffet hums, thrusting her sex toy in and out slowly. Sooner or later, the spider's going to increase the pace and was gleeful to finding out how her patron shows his weakness.

*KNOCK! KNOCK! *

"!!!" Papyrus can feel he was close until both occupants heard a knock on the door. Muffet quickly removes the dildo, eyes wide and looked at the clock. Two hours passed, they still had time but Sans knows Papyrus is feeling excited from their pact. Muffet cursed to herself, no longer being able to see the skeleton cum or his afterglow from sex. "Curse these BLOOD Pacts."

"..." Papyrus was as horny as fuck, but he dispersed his pussy and placed his pants up. Papyrus stood up, hissing in a pissed tone. "It had to be fucking Sans."

"Crap. Papyrus get inside my pet's mouth. Now." Muffet ordered. She was fixing her clothes and was internally panicking. Papyrus looks at the huge cupcake monster and asked, "You got to be kidding with me. Why am I going to hide when Sans is coming over and have you ever cleaned your pet's mouth? More importantly, did you even feed your pet?!" 

"It likes you so you have no problem with it. It's Sans I'm worried about. You and I have no idea what he'll do if he sees you cheating on him." Muffet cleanses the dildo with fire magic. Papyrus wondered why everyone sees him and Sans as a couple. They were only brothers with him being paranoid with majority of the monster populace so he assigned most of the important tasks to Sans... Okay. She has a point but he's going to end that rumor after this One-night stand thing. He sighs and climbs up the cupcake's mouth.

"...." The cupcake was docile, closing its mouth carefully with the skeleton inside. Papyrus twitched inside, the mouth is all wet and slimy. Good thing skeletons don't need to breath. Gah! Papyrus cringed when he feels the Muffet's pet lightly massage him with its tongue. This feels more wrong than good in so many levels.

"Hello Sans. Didn't you know it's closing time~?" Muffet frowned as she saw the small skeleton come in without her permission. Sans flicked a spider as he asked in a small suggestive manner, "have you seen boss~?"

"He left recently Sansy~ You worried for your younger brother?" Muffet mocked. She knows Sans hates that childish nickname but god does it feel great insulting monsters. Sans waved his hand and pushed her to the floor. Telekinesis? Trapped by blue bones, Muffet stared at Sans who looked down at her.

"save it in the bed, sweetheart." Sans grinned when Muffet raised her free hand to slap him. Muffet blushed, annoyed at how the skeleton brought that topic again. True. Sans had been a great fucker when they had a go, but not in front of Papyrus! Even if he's slowly being swallowed by her pet, Papyrus might still be able hear them. Speaking about Papyrus....!

"Get out right now!" Muffet ordered, not in the mood for flirts. She knows Sans isn't in the mood either. Going to fuck his brother at night? Either Sans is trying a new kink or he's trying to make the skeleton relaxed. Papyrus is a well-known workaholic. But for the female populace, Papyrus is secretly sought for... Fortunate that she knows him as a patron~ She also doesn't know if her pet was molesting Papyrus with its tongue or making him fall down its throat in a slow manner. She isn't going to risk the possibilities.

"fine fine. sheesh. bye toots~" Sans chuckled and walked away slowly. Muffet dusted herself and knew the skeleton can sense Papyrus somewhere. After not moving an inch, Muffet finally sees the small skeleton leave her area. She closed the doors once more and ordered her pet to vomit Papyrus out.

"..." It refused and it was happy. Muffet started tapping her feet holding her gun. After a few moments, Muffet personally went over to her pet and began smacking it with plates, knives and gun until it vomited.

 

*BLARGH! *

 

"...." Papyrus came out covered in saliva, mucus and blood. Papyrus was silent, going on all four with difficulty because of the sticky mucus. Removing his scarf, Papyrus caught the handkerchief of Muffet and wiped his face. Papyrus sat down, disgusted with himself and the risk he took to avoid his brother.

"SO... AT LEAST I KNOW HOW VORAREPHILIA WORKS AND IT'S NOT MY THING..." Papyrus' comment made the spider laugh. Papyrus spat the saliva inside him, standing up to walk inside Muffet's private Bathroom. "LET'S NOT DO THAT ANYMORE, AGREED?"

"What... Whatever you say... My King." Muffet tries her best not to laugh as the skeleton walked inside her bathroom, clenching the dripping handkerchief and scarf. Wiping a tear on her lower left eye, Muffet joked. "You should explore more kinks when you have time. I'll be willing to HELP you on that task. Free of charge~"

"No. Let's not." Papyrus opened the shower head, unable to get the strange feeling away. 'Disgusting!'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Is that all I do in a fuck session..." The tall skeleton inquired to the female spider by the door, "Especially towards my own BLOOD brother?"
> 
> The Secretary laughs at her King, "Yes. Let your inner feelings out and discard them entirely the next day~"
> 
> ...  
> .
> 
> "And if I can't discard these so-called feelings?" Papyrus asked before he left the parlor.
> 
> Muffet gave a wry grin. "Then that means you're in Love~"


	4. CONVERSATION BETWEEN BROTHERS BEFORE THEY ACT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans doesn't understand what's wrong (heavily integrated into the system) and prepares to learn the answer while having fun. Papyrus, he isn't ready for this but might as well this over with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans can be charming and hardworking if he wants to be just like every other Sans, but he's like the majority of them... Overall preferring to be lazy, patient and punny. Papyrus? This Papyrus is like the rest of the Papyrus except he fights with logic and without remorse so it makes sense why he questions the strange actions of his brother. (Responsible Papyrus for the win.)

'you gotta be kidding with me?' Sans sighs, looking around the Underground for any signs of the King... More like his sweet-craving brother. Exiting the parlor, Sans was titled Judge, Royal Scientist and Adviser (He can do all three with minimal effort except he has to kill more dunces on the Judge part) all at the same time. The small skeleton made it his personal job to look after his workaholic boss. The same one who has major trust issues and is depriving himself of a good fuck. Sans, himself, was used to the fucking and getting fucked by other monster from the amount of RESETs done by the Human. Sans doesn't really give a damn about attachments and Love. His brother does and it annoys him.

 

"..." Sans returns to the lab, making sure all preparations and accidents will be thwarted beforehand. He isn't going to let tomorrow's cuddle session be cut short. Papyrus tends to be the cuddle type, but he would not hesitate to push his own brother off and do his job as King. There are more factors that ticks Sans off with the taller skeleton: One, he was given the task of making an heir. Two, he keeps getting shipped off to Grillby's or some other person's house when he's in Heat. Three, he never gives his brother pleasure, always in the receiving end. Four, he keeps getting rejected and for once in his miserable life, Sans wants Papyrus to fuck him hard and if not, let him fuck Papyrus hard. Five, Papyrus is keeping the famous Chocolate of King Asgore. He has his own share, but he finished it and wants more. Remembering that Papyrus also has his share of chocolate, Sans was often forbidden to touch it. Thus, he secretly goes inside Papyrus' room and takes a lick of Papyrus' SOUL. Good thing boss sleeps like a log or he'd be charged of trespassing and rape. Heh. The Judge trialed by the King.

 

"damn disease... should _probably_ find the cure." Sans notes, as he warped to a familiar pastry shop to buy some sweets. Instead of the usual ugly face, he saw the pastry owner's dust. Wanting to buy food for dinner, Sans didn't trust the maids when he mentioned 'Make some decent desserts.' Speaking about DESPAIR, he wondered when Papyrus was going to fess up so he can have more funds to do more experimentation. Stealing the desserts, Sans selectively chose what he wants to taste because he was forcing Papyrus to eat these. He knows, he just knows Papyrus is going to douse himself with that shitty coffee and that doesn't taste good in the mouth... Kissing he means, not sucking. He is not a cock sucker, just... really likes mustard and chocolate. Since Papyrus doesn't drink mustard, chocolate will do. Hmm... He should also add a special 'something' to these, last time and all. Sans' smile widened at the thought.

 

"..." Sans mulled over his thoughts, heading back to the castle using his shortcuts. As his brother's One-monster-army, he had to keep himself well-alert on most gossips and trends or Papyrus is gonna go around and be a womanizing douche... Correction, a womanizing, teasing but conservative closet pervert. Recently, Papyrus confessed to flirting with him as part of some experiment. So all those swift kisses and hugs were artificial...? Sans doesn't believe any of that and he plans of plucking it out tonight. Sans will admit he cares for his brother, but hates the guy's rants. Losing his brother's constant verbal scolding and presence though... is starting to make the small skeleton turn his head in confusion.

 

"have you seen boss?" Sans asked one of the butlers, but the monster shook his head before heading back to the kitchen. That's right, he misses his brother. He wants Papyrus to mind him because he's doing all he can to help the jerk so he definitely deserves some praises for his job! Any method really... He thought it was the kisses and hugs, but it made Sans feel queasy and awful. Even if it's disgusting, Sans began to want more of that Love. It's addicting like cocaine, but he can't avail of it because that Love came from Papyrus and you don't ask things from Boss. Sans decided to continue on his sessions: Drink, Fuck, Smoke or inhale. Then Sans stops for a whole week after the sudden Heat cycle and felt awful - Withdrawal was a horrible feeling. Sans stopped because he turned to garnering LOVE as a stimulant, **highly effective without any dosage** as described by Alphys in her notes. While feeling like shit, he also learned about Papyrus being a dick and actually toying with his feelings so Sans was going to use the opportunity to return all those fuck favors. Sans is also going to make sure Papyrus regrets his decision of not getting a lover of his own. He could overthrow the kingdom if Papyrus lets his guard down.

 

"...." Sans sat on his chair at the dining hall, waiting for his brother to come. But does he like his brother? 'Yes.' More than a brother? 'I don't know.' And that's where the problem starts because Sans was sure he hates Papyrus yet he rages when he sees the taller skeleton flirting with females and even males. He knows he's gone too far when he finds himself threatening monsters if they get too close to the King. Damn it! Sans knows he's a protective brother, but incest was turning into a possible symptom when you're around Papyrus. He just... Papyrus is terrifying and innocent at the same time. Even if Incest is permitted to increase the monster specie, Papyrus will make him feel it's wrong.

"don't touch that." Sans ordered, slouching on the chair as maids and butlers began to come in to place the food. Sans already placed his dessert on the far corner of the rectangle wooden table and he made sure no one would touch what Papyrus will eat afterwards. Sans will make sure Boss eats it because it was the King's favorite (mentioned by Undyne and Alphys back when they were still alive...). Sans grew bored, pulling out his phone and started to check the UnderNet and the rampaging news.

 

"pft. really?" Sans grinned, reading the news feed on his phone. He was reading the article where Papyrus had murdered an entire rebel group in one night (that was him and it was a joyful killing spree) as well as the fact he read the continuous chain mail about Papyrus and him ending their Love-Hate relationship so females should start buying the best clothes. Sans knows Papyrus won't get interested because he's too much of a work-oriented guy. He wouldn't have time doing those things-

 

> _"Didn't you hear, bone bag?" Monster Kid grinned at him cockily. Sans had to fight the urge not to flick the kid to kingdom come, but the child mentioned. "Mettaton and Papyrus are getting married and you aren't aware because they don't give a fuck about you!"_

 

"..." Sans' smile fell, blinking at the memory. Huh? So what if Papyrus falls in love with another and stops bickering with him... That is a good thing. Why was losing Papyrus back then painful? He can't recall. Protection? He's stronger now than back then. Proximity? Even if he has a lover and kids, Sans still has a job in the castle so he can still see Papyrus from time to time. The loss of a loved one? As if he cares. Sans frowned. "why am i affected with this - to prove i'm into incest or i'm a pure masochist for a sadist?"

 

* * *

 

"YOU'RE EARLY." Papyrus voice greets him awake, walking in his old battle armor and not the King's clothing. It was nice to know his brother doesn't like wearing the grand outfit since Sans liked the battle armor more than this one. It was more Papyrus while the King's outfit reminded him of King Asgore, the same furry who secretly wished for his wife to come back to him... Sad. Anyways, Sans didn't want to be startled from this greeting and made his smile into a frown. Papyrus was a master in reading body movement, but he learned everything from experience. His little brother knows so little of the deceit within the Underground's mafia.

"you're late." Sans comments, staring at his brother while he enters the area. All of the butlers and maids were there waiting until the King sat down and ordered them. They were waiting for the King to start cursing at them because of the imbalance of sweets to the dining table. Sans was the one who gave the order and watched Papyrus turn silent, staring at the dessert. Sans grinned, "yes boss? there a problem with the menu?"

"LEAVE." Papyrus ordered, staring at the maids and butlers surrounding them. Sans took a sip, watching all of the servants bow and leave the room. Now the two of them were left alone in the dining hall. Papyrus didn't respond to his question, poking the chocolate-filled croissant with his fork. Everything on the table was desserts and Papyrus wasn't commenting at the absurdity to it. San grew a little nervous, small beads of sweat start to form on his skull. 'what does boss want this time?'

"geez boss. ya didn't hafta scare them away." Sans lightly scolded as he watched his younger brother take a sip from his red wine. Papyrus stared at the side, mulling over something. Sans internally wondered if Grillby's suggestion was right to eat chocolate while drinking red wine or was the fire bartender messing around with him?

 

"FIRST THINGS FIRST. SANS. (Takes a deep breath) THIS IS UNHEALTHY." The childish response caused the older brother to laugh. "b-boss! the fuck? we're skeletons. we can eat anything to replenish energy!"

"I REALLY HATE HOW SKEWERED YOUR LOGIC TENDS TO BE. (Papyrus sighs) PUTTING ASIDE, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING AND I WANT NEITHER OF THOSE GOSSIP MONGERS LISTENING IN ON US." Papyrus confessed. Ah. The problems of having Paranoia or was it because of the King's recent conversation with that woman? It can't be that one... Sans was sure Muffet and Papyrus have as limited contact as possible when he learned those females were starting to go after his brother. But then, he went everywhere and still can't find Papyrus until right now... Sans rolled his eyes, "sure boss. just like every other time we eat together." 

"SANS. WHY DO YOU KEEP FUCKING WITH PEOPLE?" Papyrus inquired, stabbing his croissant, letting melted chocolate come out of the bread as he cuts it with a knife. Sans paused, that was a strange yet blunt question. There was no hint of jealousy or anger, it was plain curiosity. Sans doesn't understand what his answer will bring so he plays safe. Boss was the type who takes things seriously. Why else does he get fooled with his pranks and walk right into his puns each and every time? Sans asked back, his eyes meeting his attentive yet undecipherable brother. "does that bother you?"

"IT DISTURBS ME GREATLY, ESPECIALLY WHEN I NEED YOUR PRESENCE IN COURT." Papyrus growled, looking at him as he raises his croissant piece in the air. The chandelier above them slightly moved to and fro, Sans decided to check the window pane beside them. 'how is it so windy in the room?'

 

"it's essential when i'm in heat or if i need some info or if i wanna have a good time." Sans shrugged, looking back at Papyrus who was staring at him oddly. Papyrus doesn't react strongly. In fact, he looks internally relieved? Sans doesn't like it when his brother was relief. It meant something was- "I SEE! SO YOU PIMP YOURSELF TO HELP THE KINGDOM? WELL. YOU SHOULD WARN YOUR FUTURE LOVER ABOUT THIS OR THEY'D TIE YOU IN YOUR ROOM. I WOULDN'T WANT ANOTHER GRILLBY MOMENT OR PSEUDO-KIDNAP SCENARIO TO OCCUR. I HAD LOST IMPORTANT TIME BECAUSE OF YOUR RECKLESSNESS."

"gland to know you chair." Sans rolled his eyes, muttering in a dark voice. Papyrus would only save him because he has work to do, stuff he has to fulfill. That was all there is to it. Right now, Papyrus doesn't listen to him when he's joking or giving puns. Because they're governing the people, there's no time for playful bicker or mischief. It was all work, work and work. If Sans make a joke while they have an audience, Papyrus would show a visible reaction and punish him later for being rude. If they were alone, Papyrus pretends he is deaf to avoid further encounter. Great and all... Except now Sans is going to have a one-sided conversation and that suck balls.

"BUT... YOU WILL NEED TO HAVE MORE TIME WITH YOUR LOVER TO PRODUCE AN HEIR. THEREFORE, I WILL NEED TO FIND A SUBSTITUTE FOR YOU-" Sans cut Papyrus' statement, immediately replying with words he did not intend to say. "no need boss. i can handle it!"

 

"ARE YOU KIDDING WITH ME SANS? NOT ONLY ARE YOU FORCED TO WORK BECAUSE OF MY SUDDEN ASCENSION, BUT YOU'RE STARTING TO LOSE YOUR LAZINESS. OKAY. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY BROTHER?" Papyrus sounds amused and Sans wanted to face palm. He didn't mean that, he was thinking out of instinct. The fact he doesn't want to be replaced or the fact he doesn't want to lose his job in the castle is because it has good pay and room service. Nothing else!

"you forced me to quit all my side-jobs! if you haven't noticed, i use that money to buy my rations!" Sans justifies, highlighting 'rations' which equate to mustard. He needs his mustard. It's his primary life line. Drugs, alcohol and sex comes later. Papyrus continues to chew on his food, staring at him as if he's to be kid with. Sans looks away, looking at his food as he stabs it with a fork - It was pie. Hm. It reminds him of the lady behind the bad ass door the Human came through. He scoops some piece of the pie into his mouth.

"IT WAS FOR THE KINGDOM! MY COURT OFFICIALS NEED A PROPER OCCUPATION EVEN IF IT'S A PART-TIME JOB!" Papyrus counters, feeling defensive for unknown reasons. "BESIDES! EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE MONEY, I KNOW YOU'LL GET FROM THE ROYAL TREASURY!"

"no i won't! if i did, i would've done it ages-!" Sans stops himself, realizing his err when Papyrus's eye lights flickered out. "ah shit. wait paps."

"..." Papyrus chews his food, looking down on his plate. Sans wants to slap himself for bringing up the topic of the past. Every time he talks about events in the past, Papyrus recalls the previous Royal Guards. Papyrus will remember Undyne and that is... A painful memory considering the fact Papyrus sees her more like a sibling than him.

 

'first step and i already ruined it.' Sans takes a bite of his pie, unsure how to feel. He just knows he fucked up. He'll have to wait for the tension to subside and start again. Yeah. That's the only thing he can do. Change the topic and hope everything turns better.

 

* * *

 

The two sat in silence. Usually, Papyrus would break it but... Sans grumbles, not looking at his brother. He's asking this because it's his job to make sure the King doesn't get himself killed. They also need to break the awkward silence. It's been happening more often than not in the past few weeks and it's alienating. "where were you?"

 

"I WAS VISITING OUR TREASURER MUFFET" Papyrus replied with a light even happy tone. This was the first in how many months that the skeleton sounded this relieved and it didn't sit well for the older skeleton. "SINCE SHE REFUSES TO LIVE IN THE ROYAL CASTLE, I WILL NEED TO UPDATE HER REGARDING THE ROYAL FINANCES."

"did she ask for anything?" Sans inquired, pretending not to care. Unfortunately, Papyrus was an expert in identifying even the smallest of detail. The taller skeleton didn't point it out yet, feeling that this worry was justifiable to a certain extent. The question sounds reasonable for the Judge to question. "ASIDE FROM THE QUESTION OF A POSSIBLE TAX INCREASE, NO. I SIMPLY NEEDED AN ADVICE OF HER FORTE."

"which would that be?" Sans twirls his wine glass before taking a sip. Huh. The wine tastes sweeter than usual. He sips some more.

"PERSONAL MATTERS." Papyrus takes another bite, frowning on Sans' unhealthy dinner plan. Sans is halfway done with his pie and he's already showing signs of disinterest. At this rate, they'll have to feed the servants with the leftovers.

"private enough not to confide to your own sibling?" Sans swears he wasn't guilt-tripping Papyrus, but the way his brother avoids answering his question makes it harder to ignore.

 

"SANS... ARE YOU JEALOUS?" Papyrus asked, taking a sip as a mischievous smile began to form on his face. Sans wanted to wring the king's neck but because of tradition (where in the dining hall when you have a huge-ass rectangular table) he could not. Sans gripped his fork and knife tight before letting go of them to give his usual smile. "nah. just wondering why you're hanging out with her, boss."

"I'M SEEING HER-" Papyrus stopped midway, noting the window pane beside them shatter for unknown reasons. Looking at the side, Papyrus saw no stone or rain. The window pane simply shattered. Sans doesn't know why his SOUL is racing and he's feeling awfully agitated for some reason, but he tries his best to calm down. Maybe, he's angry because Papyrus saw something in that **arachnid**. That greedy lil' bitch he dumped ages ago 'coz she snagged his belongings for an easy G pawnshop exchange. Papyrus twirls his fork, continuing. "TO GET SOME IDEA ON WHAT TO DO WITH YOU TONIGHT."

"..." Sans was silent as he took a bite at his pie. He didn't know he was holding his breath, exhaling feels great even if skeletons didn't need air. Papyrus shook his head and continued eating, wondering who shattered the glass. Papyrus looked at his brother, raising an eyebrow. "IS THIS WHAT THEY CALL A CLIMATE CHANGE?"

 

"..." Sans' eye lights turned dark which made Papyrus pause. Compared to Papyrus, Sans had very limited facial expression given how lazy the smaller skeleton tends to be. His emotionless expression could either be a: sad, angry and shocked look. Papyrus will never know unless- There was a deep rumble in the other side.

"climate change huh... pft." Sans couldn't believe his brother would think the Underground, a closed environment, would experience a change in weather for no reason. Yes it was possible for someone to change the weather, but that monster would be the Royal Scientist. A.K.A. Sans. God. He's already formed a prank about the weather for the clueless prick and he won't know what's coming. "i might as well implement a dry and wet season-"

"SANS. I KNOW THAT SENTENCE IS GOING TO GET DIRTY SO CAN YOU KINDLY SHUT UP AND FINISH YOUR FOOD?" Papyrus warned in advance, taking a sip of his wine. Squinting, Papyrus worried on what Sans could be planning. Seeing as the small skeleton prepared the table, it could be anything... Like the FOOD... 'I HAVE A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS.'

"what's wrong boss? i prepared all this for you, cooked some even. you should try them all." Sans tried his best to sound disappointed, using the same psychology Papyrus used on him when they first lived together. Sans could never say NO to the delicacy placed on his table. Did he say delicacy? Sans meant dull FOOD. Yeah... That's right. He doesn't miss boss' food or anything, it's just been months since he last ate some. 'fuck it. i can't believe this. i do miss his horrid cooking!'

 

"TRUE... IT'S NOT EVERYDAY YOU COOK... UNLESS IT'S DRUGS." Papyrus agreed, picking up some wrapped candy inside the baskets. Sans replied with a "yup" and watched the skeleton pop it in his mouth like a child. Sans watched as Papyrus face change with surprise and ate some more.

“got your favorites.” Sans kept grinning because Papyrus had to stand up to eat some more sweets. Boss can't get fat, he just converts it into magic and excess turns into excretion or an alteration of the taste of his magic. Sans waits until Papyrus reached his area and watched Papyrus looks down at him with a glare and an angry blush. "V-Very clever, Sans."

"you know i'm **sweet** that way... now then, can i have a treat?" Sans was sure Papyrus was trying to make his grin permanent because this skeleton sighs and leaves him to head towards Sans' coveted room. Silence means Yes, Sans can't wait to have his dessert. So the joke was on him, being the dessert he'll have to devour tonight until tomorrow. For now, Sans followed Papyrus. 'let me see what my bro thinks of me.'

 

"YOU'RE REALLY STRANGE SANS. OUT OF ALL THE POSSIBLE CONDITIONS, IT HAD TO BE THIS?" Papyrus strides to the room, ignoring the curious voices of the servants. Ordering some of the female servants on what to do with the remaining food, Papyrus faced Sans who doesn't even give him a proper response.

"i want vanilla for tonight." Sans comments and Papyrus gawks at him. Papyrus was very honest in the bed. Badmouth, but truthful. If you ask him to tease you, he'll tease you and drive you crazy with lust. The worst part here is he won't heed to your lustful reply because that wasn't part of the condition. Papyrus shakes his head and continues walking to the area. "AND WHY WOULD YOU WANT PLAIN SEX ON OUR FINAL SESSION? HAVE YOU DECIDED MASOCHISM WASN'T FOR YOU?"

"nah. i want you to keep fucking me until you pass out. i also plan on touching you until you plead for me to fuck you. ("In your dreams!" Papyrus retorts.) 'sides, we always do bdsm so... this'll be our first no torture plain ol' **talk** fuck session." Sans emphasized the last part and caused the taller skeleton to clench his hand. A prime reason Sans chose vanilla because Papyrus is a master of teasing and BDSM. _Where did he learn that?_ He can't interrogate the guy if he's overstimulated with the fucking, that's stupid. Sans also doesn't know the stamina Papyrus has after he release because Sans was going to make sure this guy will keep fucking him.

  
"..." Papyrus can sense his brother's anticipation, moving farther from him than usual.

  
"Sans... PLEASE TELL ME THOSE GOODS WEREN'T- *SIGH* YOU PLACED IT, DID YOU?" Papyrus stopped to look and just knew from his 'innocent' smile that yes. Sans has laced the desserts with some aphrodisiac and so a few minutes from now, Papyrus was going to fuck him so hard... Sans is going to regret his life decisions temporarily (being sore on the lower region because of all that thrusting) and resume with daily life. They were close to their destination before Papyrus asked, "Last chance. Are you sure about this Sans?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let the strange interrogation sex battle thing begin... Yeah... Definitely sounds weird. At least the title makes sense now.


End file.
